What is your first reaction when you hear the word "No" ?

Is it a cringing? A pang? A sadness or sense of rejection? Loss of confidence?

Or is it a sense of excitement and empowerment? Possibility? An opportunity for something else?

I've always had a hard time with the word no, hearing it and speaking it. I grew up as a people pleaser, an enabler of sorts. Yes sir, yes ma'am, yes mom and dad, yes world even if it hurts me. I did not have any sense of boundaries or even the feeling that it was ok to have boundaries.

Hearing no was hard too. I was very lucky as a child and was afforded all of the opportunities I wanted. I really didn't hear no that often, so when I did, it came as a shock.

Image by Charles Gollob

For those of you who don't follow me on social media, I've started something brave and powerful... a year of celibacy.

Now you might think "Are you crazy? A young woman in her prime not having sex?! Don't do it!" I know... but you aren't the first to say that.

I want to say this was a hard decision, but it wasn't. This is something that I have thought about doing for years.

Photo by Marie Ilchuk